


Just Hold Me

by hermioneclone



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pre Relationship, beware some language and inuendos, mostly focusing on the comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-12
Updated: 2014-01-12
Packaged: 2018-02-19 05:18:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2376116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hermioneclone/pseuds/hermioneclone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After sacrificing himself to find the Nemeton, Stiles can't sleep. Somehow, he finds himself knocking on Derek's door, looking for a place to lay his weary head.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Hold Me

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after the events of 3a and the first episode of 3b. Cannon up until that point.

Derek frowned at the knock on his door. He wasn’t expecting anyone but after his latest encounter with pain and torture, he couldn’t be too cautious. Slowly, he opened the door a crack, peering out. He sighed in relief when he saw it was only Stiles, opening the entryway fully. Except something was wrong. It was like...the life had been drained out of the boy, like he was a shell of what he once had been. “What are you doing here?” Derek asked, wincing internally at how gruff his greeting had come out. He really was curious; usually Stiles only came around if there was a crisis.

The kid shoved his hands deep into his pants pockets, shrugging without making eye contact. “I just wanted to see how you were doing. You know, after the whole torture thing and all that.”

“Eh, I’m fine,” he tried to brush it off. “Been there, done that.” A stony silence greeted him; normally Stiles would have at least snorted, reacted in some way... “Why are you really here?” he asked, making a concerted effort to soften his voice. “You could have just called to check on me. Thank you for that, by the way. Even if it’s just a ruse.”

Stiles looked up, meeting Derek’s eyes for the first time. “Can I come in?”

“Yeah, yeah, sorry,” Derek mumbled, stepping aside and waving his arm as an invitation to enter. “Do you want something to eat? Drink?”

Stiles shook his head as he sank into the couch. “No. I...I need your help.”

Derek sat down on the edge of the coffee table so he could face the kid. “What can I do?”

Stiles rubbed his face furiously with his hands, the most familiar gesture Derek had seen yet. “How much did Scott tell you? About what happened that night, about what’s been happening after you left?”

“That you two and Allison died and came back to life and now are hallucinating like crazy? That was really dumb by the way.”

Stiles face contorted into a sneer, a far cry from the put on looks of haughty superiority he used to try and intimidate Derek with when they first met. But unlike those early encounters, this look sliced him through to the core. “We were desperate. We wouldn't have even been in that situation if your psycho girlfriend hadn’t been about to kill our parents!” His voice rose in agitation as he spoke, his words flinging like perfectly aimed daggers.

“You’re right,” Derek replied simply.

That seemed to be all it took to diffuse the situation. Stiles slumped over as if he had been deflated, the fight drained out of him. “I’m sorry, that wasn’t fair.”

Derek shrugged. “Yeah, well. It was accurate.”

Stiles shook his head. “I didn’t come here to yell at you. I just...I need help. We’re trying to figure this out but I just...I don’t know what is real and what isn’t anymore and I can’t read and I can’t sleep and I just...how do you do it?”

Derek blinked at the unexpected question. “What?”

“How do you live with the pain? The gaping hole in your chest where your heart used to be?” Stiles gasped, looked up at him urgently, desperately. “I know it’s not the same thing, but I thought-”

Standing, Derek extended his hand. “Come here,” he instructed. Slowly, Stiles took it, allowing Derek to pull him up, his momentum leading him into a hug.

“What are you doing?” Stiles’s muffled voice asked, his arms hanging limply by his sides.

“I think it’s called hugging, unless you kids have some wacky newfangled name for it these days.”

He could practically see the eye roll that he hoped accompanied the groan. “I know that, dummy, and you’re not _that_ much older. But why are you hugging me?”

Derek shrugged, trying not to jostle Stiles too hard. “Because...that’s what I want when things get too much. Only...I don’t usually have anyone. So I just suck it up and deal with it.”

“So that’s your advice, be a man?” Stiles replied, clearly unimpressed.

“No,” Derek replied. “You have someone. Lots of someones. Let them help you. Let me help you. Accept my comfort, damnit!”

Stiles huffed what could have been a small chuckle, it wasn’t really clear, before winding his lanky arms around Derek, hugging him back. “I guess I don’t have a choice, do I?”

“Nope,” Derek replied, holding him tighter, though making sure he wasn’t also crushing the other’s airways. Choking Stiles would definitely not help. For once. Though at this point he would put up with all the annoying Stiles in the world if he just was back to normal again. He would do anything to make that happen. He hoped that already he was helping; some of the tension leaked out of the boy’s body as they stood there.

“I’m so tired,” Stiles whispered on an exhale. “Surprisingly enough, dreams that have you running around or living your life aren’t all that restful. But it’s more than that...I’m just so exhausted from constantly battling for reality. I don’t even know if this is real.”

“I could pinch you, would that convince you?” Derek asked as an offhand joke. His heart plummeted when Stiles pulled back, looking at him earnestly. 

“Can you? Please?”

“Sure,” Derek replied with a sigh. Reaching out, he grabbed a bit of bit of Stiles’s flesh between his thumb and forefinger, squeezing tightly. 

Stiles leapt back, squawking in indignation. “What they hell was that?” he asked, rubbing the affected area.

“I thought that’s what you wanted?” Derek asked, confused.

Stiles shrugged, plopping himself back down on the couch. “Yeah, but I meant a human pinch, not a super power werewolf one. Sheesh, I’m going to have a bruise for days.”

“Sorry,” Derek replied, truly feeling guilty for hurting the boy even if he had a feeling that the exhaustion was adding to his usual penchant for the dramatic. “At least you know you’re not dreaming?” he half asked, half offered.

“Yeah, I guess. Probably.” Stiles replied, followed by a deep sigh. “I don’t know anymore.”

Derek grabbed Stiles’s hand, pulling him up as gently but determinedly as possible. “Come on, I have an idea.” Thankfully, Stiles didn’t try to fight him as Derek pulled him over to his bed. Walking over to the dresser, he pulled out an old T-shirt and sweatpants and tossed them over to Stiles, whom he had left sitting on the edge of his bed.

“What, are you going to seduce me to make things all better?” Stiles asked skeptically as he played with the clothes absentmindedly. “‘Cause I’m pretty sure it doesn’t work that way.”

Shoving back unshared memories of the time Jennifer had helped him heal with her intimate caress, Derek turned back to his young friend with a slight smirk on his face, arms crossed against his chest. “No, but you are going to sleep with me.”

Stiles’s frowned deeply. “Don’t I get a say in the matter.”

Derek rolled his eyes playfully. “Not like that you idiot. Like sleep sleep. As in nighty night?”

Standing up quickly, Stiles threw the clothes violently onto the bed, head shaking vigorously. “I don’t think that’s a very good idea.”

“Why not?” Derek asked. 

“I told you...it’s bad. Really bad. You don’t need to see that. I don’t want you to.” His eyes looked determined, but frightened. And not in the way he’d seen before...it was almost like staring into the eyes of Stiles ten years before, desperately fighting back tears because he lost his favorite blankie his mom made for him or something.

“Look,” Derek began softly as he walked over to Stiles. “How many times have you come through for me? You’ve seen me in pretty bad shape...let me return the favor.”

“Derek-”

“Let me actually be able to do something that matters for once,” he practically begged, not knowing how much he desired the ability to actually help for a change until he uttered the words. “Please.”

Stiles looked at him hesitatingly before nodding slowly. “Okay.”

“I can just...let you get changed.” Derek responded awkwardly. “Um, bathroom’s over there, but of course you know that already because you’ve been here...” His head jerked up when he heard a soft chuckle.

“You’re kind of cute when you're nervous,” Stiles informed him, a hint of the usual cheekiness shining through. 

“I’m not nervous,” Derek huffed, turning to walk out of the room to give stiles space. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Stiles replied. A smile slowly crept onto Derek’s face, relieved that there was still some hope. 

“There should be an extra toothbrush in the cabinet,” he called out. Plopping himself down on the couch, he picked up one of Cora’s magazines that was left out on the table. It had come in the mail earlier but it wasn’t like she was around to read it. He was thankful that she managed to get away before he and Peter got caught, and he knew that she was safe in hiding somewhere and would lay low for a while until she got his signal. But it didn’t mean that he worried any less. The last time he had said goodbye to a sister, it had been for good.

“Didn’t know you were into chick magazines.” He jumped at Stiles’s voice, tossing the glossy packet onto the table so vigorously that it slid right off onto the floor.

“It’s Cora’s,” he replied a little more tersely than he meant to. “Besides, that stuff is a bunch of crap. The only reason she gets it is to make fun of the stupid sex tips.” He inhaled sharply when his mind caught up to his mouth, looking at Stiles tentatively.

Stiles swallowed nervously, his adam’s apple bobbing in an almost cartoonish fashion. “Well if you’re looking to try any of those out, I have to inform you that I probably know even less about sex than the people who write Cosmo.” Derek arched an eyebrow. “My mom did the same thing and my dad couldn’t bare to cancel the subscription after she died. I’d read them to feel close to her, which sounds really silly and vaguely incestuous oh my god stop talking Stiles...” he muttered, hitting himself in the head. 

“I get it,” Derek replied, walking over to the younger man and clasping him by the shoulder. “And I already told you, that isn’t my plan.”

Stiles nodded frantically, his shoulders sagging in a faint disappointment. “One of these days I’ll finally get laid,” he sighed deeply. A laugh bubbled through Derek’s chest and erupted out of his mouth before he could do anything about it, his eyes crinkling in mirth like they hadn’t in so long. “Stop laughing at me!” Stiles protested.

“Sorry, sorry,” Derek apologized. “It’ll happen, I promise. Just...”

“Just what?” Stiles asked warily. 

“Don’t force it. Don’t do it because you feel so lonely and suddenly you're not anymore. Make it matter.”

“Derek...” Stiles replied, his voice laden with more emotions than Derek was capable of dissecting. 

“I hate the idea of you hurting.” He chuckled. “Who would have thought, right? I know I’m going to regret saying this, but when you’re all kind of annoying and frantic and all that...you really just light everything up.”

“Well, I think the light’s gone out,” Stiles replied bitterly, the brief moment of normalcy or whatever the hell that was evaporating as suddenly as it appeared. 

“Hey, no,” Derek insisted, tilting Stiles’s chin up from its resting place on his chest before he could overthink what he was doing. “Dimmed maybe. But not out. You’re going to figure out how to fix this. You are going to get through this. I’m gonna help you.” 

“How?” Stiles asked desperately.

“Do you trust me?” Derek asked, even though he probably knew the answer. 

A softness fell over Stiles’s features. “I think somehow I always have. Well, except for the time-”

“Stiles.”

“Yeah?”

“Rambling.”

“Sorry.”

“Just come with me.” Taking Stiles’s hand again he led him towards the bedroom. “Does your dad know where you are?”

Stiles nodded. “I told him I was staying the night with a friend. He’s probably worried but also kinda relieved that he won’t have to wake up to me screaming for at least one night. Sorry in advance for that, but I warned you...”

“Who knows, maybe you’ll even surprise yourself.”

Stiles just rolled his eyes. “So, what now?”

Derek grabbed the corner of the comforter and sheets and flung them neatly back in an almost perfect triangle before sliding into the space they left behind. “You coming?”

“I thought you said we weren’t doing that,” Stiles teased. 

“Ha ha, you are so funny,” Derek responded, forcing himself to keep his well practiced straight face. “Now get your smart ass into my bed.”

Mock saluting, Stiles replied, “Sir, yes sir!” before complying. Once he was settled, Derek threw the blankets over both of them. There was still an awkward distance between them that he wasn’t quite sure how to cross. Thankfully, Stiles took the lead. “So, what now?”

“Would it be okay if I...touched you.” His eyes widened. “Not like that!” he replied hastily to Stiles’s smirk. “I just thought...if I held you...maybe your body would know that it was safe and maybe it would tell your mind to stop being a dick and let you sleep.”

Stiles’s eyebrows practically shot up into his hairline. “That’s...”

“Dumb, I know, sorry, maybe you were right-”

“I was going to say brilliant. And super sweet of you. You don’t have to do this, you know.”

Derek shrugged, looking down at his feet. “You’re my friend. And I don’t have very many of those,” he replied simply, not quite sure how else to respond. 

A smile tugged at Stiles’s lips. “And here I thought you didn’t like me.” Wiggling slightly, he scooted closer to Derek until they were practically pressed against each other. “Alright, I am ready for Operation Cuddlebug to commence.”

Derek snorted. “Operation Cuddlebug?” he asked skeptically.

“If you’ll recall I’m not operating on optimum brain capacity at the moment, cut me some slack and spoon me damn it.” Nodding, Derek opened his arms so Stiles could scoot in, his back against Derek’s chest. 

“You okay?” Derek asked softly after a few minutes of silence. He didn’t think Stiles had fallen asleep yet, but if he had, the last thing he’d want to do was wake him up. 

“This should be weird,” Stiles replied. “Why isn’t this weird? Also, you’re really hot. I mean, temperature wise, though that’s not to say that you’re not attractive because sheesh those abs-”

“Stiles.”

“Yeah?”

“Shut up and sleep.”

The body in his arms sagged a little. “Fine. But you do realize it’s like seven o’clock, right?”

“Just try?”

“Fine,” Stiles relented, settling in. “‘Night, Derek.”

“Goodnight, Stiles.”

Derek inhaled deeply, slowly, building a steady rhythm that he hoped Stiles would follow. Soon enough, Stiles’s breathing became more shallow, peaceful even. Gently so as not to disturb him, Derek slipped his hand under Stiles’s shirt to touch the skin. He felt kind of guilty but he needed skin on skin contact for what he wanted to do. He wasn’t sure if it would work, but it was worth a shot. He closed his eyes, honing in on the pain that was seeping through their connection, drawing it out while being careful not to overexert himself.  He repeated it for as long as he possibly could, though he wasn’t able to last nearly long enough.

Just as he was about to join Stiles and pass out into a blissful slumber, a soft buzzing from the nightstand jarred him awake. Awkwardly reaching over Stiles, Derek reached for the phone, trying not to jostle his sleeping companion. One glance at the caller ID and he knew he had to take it. Carefully, he slipped out of bed and padded over to the living area. Accepting the call on what was probably the last ring until it went to voicemail, Derek answered. “Hello?”

“Who is this?” the sheriff's voice sounding confused and on the verge of panic.

“Sir, it’s Derek Hale. I’m the friend Stiles mentioned.”

“I wondered why he didn’t just say he was going over to see Scott,” the sheriff muttered. Where’s Stiles? Why are you answering his phone?”

“He’s asleep.”

A pause. “Asleep as in eyes closed and not screaming his head off?”

“So far...yeah.”

The sheriff let out a low whistle. “Well, props to you kid, I haven’t been able to do squat for him. I just wanted to check in but I don’t want you to wake him up. He needs all the rest he can get.”

“I’ll take care of him,” Derek promised.

“Can you do me one thing? Call me if there is any trouble, if he needs me...I don’t care how late it is, just call.”

“I will.”

“And if you hurt him-”

“That’s the last thing I want, sir.”

“Thank you, Hale. I...I still don’t get all this stuff. But from what Stiles told me, you do. So thanks for being able to help him. I appreciate it.”

“Thanks,” Derek replied before the sheriff ended the call, both flattered and intimidated by Stiles’s apparently high opinion of his abilities. Slowly, he made his way back to the bedroom, stepping carefully so as not to make any of the floorboards squeak. He didn’t need to worry, he realized as he returned Stiles’s cell to the nightstand and crawled back under the covers; Stiles was down for the count. Winding his arms around him, Derek basked in the feeling of a warm body next to him. He knew it was selfish. This was about helping his friend. But still...it felt nice not to be alone.

*#*#*#*#*#*#*

Derek peaked into his room for about the tenth time when he finally saw movement from the lump on his bed that was Stiles. “Good morning, sunshine,” he greeted almost cheerfully. 

Stiles groaned, the sound low and guttural and entirely adorable. He half sat up, his hair sticking up at odd angles as he rubbed his eyes. “What am I doing here?”

Derek frowned. “You don’t remember? You came over to talk and I convinced you to stay.”

Stiles’s eye widened before blinking rapidly in an attempt to wake up. “Yeah, right.”

“You okay?” Derek asked, walking over to the bed and sitting on the edge next to his friend. 

“I think so...” Stiles replied. “I remember going to sleep...and then that’s it until just now.”

“So no dreams?”

“I guess...” Stiles answered uneasily. “It almost feels too good to be true.”

“Well, for the record you slept like a baby.”

Stiles pulled his legs up, wrapping his arms around his knees and resting his chin on top of the whole thing. “But that’s what I want you to say,” he replied sadly.

“Close your eyes,” Derek instructed. “Concentrate. How do you feel?”

“Vaguely human?” Stiles replied almost instantly. “Rested.”

“Did you ever feel that in your nightmares?”

“No...” Stiles responded cautiously. “But to be fair, I haven’t felt that when I am pretty sure I am awake, so...”

“I could pinch you again.”

“Ha!” Stiles laughed, the glint back in his eye for a split second. “Like you could get me to fall for that one again.”

“Speaking of getting you things, do you want something to eat?” Derek asked. “It’s almost lunchtime, I could order something or I have cereal...”

“Lunchtime?” Stiles squealed looking at the clock next to the bed. “Holy shit I was out for a long time.” he shook his head vigorously. “Fine, yeah. But is that all you have?”

Derek shrugged. “I haven’t had a chance to get to the store, I’ve been living off takeout and the few things I picked up at the convenience store once I got back.”

Stiles smiled in understanding. “Cereal is good.”

*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*

Derek knew he was being weird. But he just didn’t want Stiles to leave. 

It was strange. It was possibly the longest he’d ever been around Stiles, even if half of it they were asleep. But still...things had been so quiet since he’d come home and just having another body around felt...nice. But he couldn’t get ahead of himself, could't do the exact thing he’d warned Stiles about. He’d been down that road before and got burned.

But his dad had called and Stiles felt guilty for leaving him hanging so long, so after they each devoured a bowl of raisin bran, Stiles quickly changed back into his clothes and got ready to leave. Once he was ready, they faced each other in the kitchen, an awkwardness filling the space between them that hadn’t existed before.

“Thank you,” Stiles replied simply and sincerely. “I think you were right about the light. I don’t know what you did...but I think it helped.”

“Anytime,” Derek replied. “If you need anything...”

“I know,” Stiles whispered softly, closing the distance between them, looking tenderly at Derek. Before he knew it his arms were full of Stiles, hugging him tighter than he’d been hugged in his life. “That goes for you too, you know,” he added, pulling back slightly. “You’re not alone anymore.” Stiles placed a soft kiss right on the corner of his mouth before pulling back and smiling coyly as he walked out the door.

Derek stood there frozen, the place where Stiles’s lips had pressed so gently searing into his skin. 

Maybe there was hope after all.


End file.
